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Trump chart

Donald Trump’s
Bowl Planetary Pattern

The Bowl Planetary Pattern is a chart in which all ten planets are within half of the zodiacal circle. Bowl people function best in crisis situations, where they can hold steadfast under strain. However, that steadfastness can turn into intractability.

The filled half of the chart symbolises what they have to give to the world and the unoccupied portion what they, consciously or unconsciously, feel they lack.

Uranus in the Tenth House of Donald Trump’s chart indicates an ambitious and willful individual who is rebellious of authority and also somewhat hung up about it. With this placement, he is a non-conformist, forward-thinking, and will not be satisfied with existing stagnant political solutions1.

He has an active imagination and is so sure of himself that he often cannot be argued out of an opinion, which can be a trifle eccentric at times. He has an impulse toward prestige and authority, but may find himself bored with the conventional approaches to attaining worldly success.

He may have gone through many different careers, coming into conflict with others over what were merely ego-gratification issues. He will do better when his motivation is to benefit society rather than focusing on personal gain.

His challenge is to move forward from a knee-jerk reaction against established authority toward discovering the right way make his vision available to the surrounding social matrix.

Uranus in Gemini makes Donald T. restless. He can grasp new concepts quickly but is likely to change his focus quite a bit. Exploring new subjects is essential to him, but fulfilling long-term commitments can be tricky. He can spark new ideas in the minds of others, but his relationships with friends and associates are probably sporadic.

Upsetting circumstances in his youthful relationships created an instability that propels his ability to operate unrestrained by conventional attitudes or public opinion.

True success for Donald Trump will be his discovery of a uniquely Trumpian interior manifestation of a higher vision.

1. Alternative interpretation: “Uranus in the 10th house means he’s likely to say deranged things in the electronic media in the wee small hours of the morning. He’s also a narcissist.”

How your star sign
relates to gardening

Aries begins the spring. You are a fiery, energetic, and quick individual who likes spicy, invigorating plants and foods. Growing onions, garlic, leeks, cayenne peppers, and tomatoes in the garden is easy for you and brings joy and excitement. (Putting all of these together in a spaghetti sauce is nirvana.) Red is your color, brave soul, and any flower of this hue attracts you. Red bee balm, poppies, zinnias, and celosia are particularly appealing. As the first sign of the zodiac, you love to pioneer new frontiers and directions. The newest plant varieties introduced by the local nursery will be sure to find a home in your garden.

Taurus settles, or deepens, the spring. Practical and value oriented, you like consistency and stability. Your garden preferences are also deeply rooted: Carrots, beets, potatoes, and turnips appeal to you and flourish under your care. With your heightened sense of taste and touch, you prefer comfort foods to faddish fare. All forms of potatoes (chips, fries, baked, or mashed) might be found as staples of the evening meal. You love to feel the earth under your feet and will kick off your shoes whenever possible. Taurus likes the tried-and-true, so heirloom varieties of plants that bloom in any color grace your gardens.

Gemini finishes the spring, but the sense that a change of seasons is near keeps you light and airy. Plants that mimic your style, such as dill, calendula, caraway, and parsley, are easy for you to grow and make your heart dance. Wild carrot and dandelion—whose airborne seeds swirl and twirl in the wind—bring joy and contentment. You find yellow flowers particularly captivating, and dashes of this color can be found liberally in your yard. Salads grace your evening meals (the quickness of “wash and eat” is indescribably tantalizing). Toss some calendula blossoms right in the bowl for an added dash of pizzazz and panache.

Cancer begins the summer. Because your sensitive soul loves to feed and nourish itself and others, nutritious plants such as sweet potatoes are near and dear to your heart. You find them easy to grow and will experiment with many recipes for their use. You are ruled by the Moon, so all nightblooming flowers are also akin to you. Evening primrose, moonflowers, evening stock, and night-blooming cereus fill the Cancer twilight garden with intoxicating scents and mystical magic. Hearty soups and casseroles on your dinner table are filled with everything that’s good for you.

Leo settles, or deepens, the summer. With your sunny disposition, Jerusalem artichokes, black-eyed Susans, and sunflowers adorn your gardens and are quite easy for you to grow. Leos never do things halfheartedly, so massive and extensive displays of orange gaillardia, poppies, marigolds, and/or zinnias grace your front walkways and patio beds. Astalwart soul, you take great pride in your surroundings and desire to have the best in the neighborhood. Your zest for living can be seen in the salsas, gazpachos, and saffron dishes produced in your grandiose kitchen. Expect a large bottle of hot sauce to reside there as well.

Virgo ends the summer. The major heat of the season is beginning to pass, and there is a hint of a change just around the corner. As this sign truly represents the harvest, you, an industrious soul, love all things that last or keep. Potatoes are a big favorite here, as well as corn and many varieties of winter squashes. You are an ardent organizer; we expect to see neat, trim rows of vegetables in your gardens. Gloves live on your hands for the entire growing season, as you love to check items off of your “to do” list with patient persistence. Everything has its place in these kitchens, and meat and potatoes are on the menu with consistent regularity.

Libra begins the fall. Because of your concern for beauty, flowers of all kinds abound in your garden. Color is important to you: Ranges from bright to subtle will be artfully placed throughout your decks and patios. You are not particularly fond of getting your hands dirty, so look for the local nursery truck to make frequent visits all summer long. Flowering bushes and trees will be tucked along fences and borders nestled in their beds of mulch. You always want to make a favorable impression; pansies and nasturtiums appear in your salads and roses, and lilies adorn your dining room table.

Scorpio deepens the fall. Always having a plan, you make sure that successive plantings of snap peas or lettuce grace your gardens. You are the strongest member of the zodiac and thus are attracted to vigorous plants such as Swiss chard, which regrows when cut. Tomatoes appeal to you for the color red, and eggplants for their affinity with purple. Being sexy and passionate, you are captivated by exotic lilies, with their deep, nectar-coated throats. You like a challenge, so sushi and Thai foods are often on the menu in your kitchen.

Sagittarius ends the fall. The seasons are about to shift again, so the expectation of change is part of your personality. With Jupiter (the largest planet in the solar system) as your ruling planet, you are partial to plants that grow bigger: Azaleas, rhododendrons, and rosemary fill the bill here. Giant sunflowers as well as beans and peas that climb tantalize your soul. You are fond of action and the outdoors; plants that spread out and seem wild and free excite you. Look for lily-of-the-valley or patches of mint in your garden. Quick and easy meals such as salmon and salad grace your dinner table, and popcorn is your regular snack.

Capricorn begins the winter. You are a serious, organized soul, so create formal plantings of tulips and daffodils in the spring. Summer gardens include fieldstone pathways between neat rows of pole beans, radicchio, and cucumbers. As a conscientious and disciplined person, you strive for a long season and a full year; therefore, spinach, arugula, and chicory grace the fall selections. Hearty soups and stews are long-term favorites for your dinner and are always served with your best china and silver.

Aquarius deepens the winter. Being an extremely independent individual, you favor easy-care plants like pumpkins and squashes (whose leaves quickly shade and kill weeds) meandering alongside your walkways and patios. Peas and snow peas can be found climbing radiantly up your porch railings, while tomatoes appeal to your egalitarian nature. The annual scattering of wildflowers brings great joy to your heart. In the kitchen, all manner of fruits can be found stacked in your bowls and on counters and tables. What can be simpler than wash-and-eat? Eclectic friends bring ethnic tabboulehs, ratatouilles, and couscous to share enthusiastically.

Pisces completes the winter. Spring is just around the corner, so a sense of change is inherent in this sign. Pisceans generally possess a sense of creativity, so look for graceful plants such as lupines and poppies to be scattered around your yard. A rainbow of colors splashes brilliantly in front of your doors and alongside your walkways. Cucumbers, melons, and summer squashes appeal to your watery natures. Many Pisces love to cook, and hearty chicken or fish soups are always simmering on your stove and in your slow cooker. Gazpacho and vichyssoise are also perennial favorites.

Farmer’s Almanac

The Year Ahead

Without a doubt, 2018 will be a year to get down to business. A series of planetary switch-ups allows for notable support in practical matters. Trust your instincts. You'll also seek out an innovative approach to your finances, with great potential for success.

Back on October 10 of 2017, Jupiter began swimming in the emotional depths of Scorpio, and remains in this sign until November 8, 2018. With Jupiter moving swiftly through Scorpio you're already feeling comfortable with profound, intimate, emotional exchanges in your relationships. You'll continue to feel blessed when you explore hidden terrain, since you'll likely find buried treasure that will help you grow spiritually, psychologically, and physically.

NOTE: The articles on these pages are mostly nonsense. For God’s sake, do not believe or attempt any of them! They are here as a testament to the stupidity and gullibility of humans, and proof that snake oil salesmen are still alive and prospering in the 21st century